Jun. 26, 2o1oMarch Participants
Thank you to those who participated! Feel free to send in your links, and I'll link you guys here:
- Charlie Boy by sooner or later its over
- Cold Feet by Captcha
- The Desert's Dance by Sobriquets
- Head Over Heels by Artume
- My Safe Haven by monkeybar ohmaniac
- Show Time by Nota
- This is Normal by Aderyn Azula
June: General Feedback
To be typed.
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June Flasher
Our winner is Sobriquets with The Desert's Dance! Congratulations!
The Desert's Dance by Sobriquets
The desert sun beats down on the land without mercy. In my village, the sand travels as much as the people who live there, always upon the wind with wild freedom. Next to the dunes that surround our huts, my village is like a parasite upon the back of a great and dangerous predator. Nothing grows here save for our anguish and starvation.
The desert appears as an endless sea of gold beneath the wide, blue sky. A trickling stream dirtied by the winds follows a shallow path through the village. Wild animals flock to the stream, including my people, crouching at the streams edge to lap at the water desperately. Our stomachs swell and our feet burn upon the sand but the desert has not squelched our lives yet.
I watch sand dance in the slow wind from the shade of my hut. Other villagers search a short distance from the village for anything resembling food. In the distance, the horizon seems to blur with the sky. The Christian heaven seems not too far from here, but the villagers aren't fooled by the illusion.
Across the way from my families shrunken hut, a stooped old woman picks ticks from her old, starving goat. The goat bleats brokenly, obviously hungry. From the looks of it's thin body, it will not be long before the nanny runs dry, just like the rest of the desert. The old woman murmurs to herself as she picks and eats parasites off the goat, no matter how small. When she sees me watching, she turns her insane musing toward me.
"The desert lives. Like a great solitary beast, the winds and the sands breathe…you live too long, and the desert buries you alive. It leaves the bones white and clean on the altar of God," she says, smiling with but a few teeth in her mouth.
"The desert dances like a woman, entrancing. Either you follow her steps and listen to her song, or die at her feet. Nobody survives the desert, everything dies hereæbut I see life rise from this great cursed land, rise from the ruins of death."
I stare at the woman without truly seeing her. Her rough voice reminds me of my mothers, pulling me into my memories, the last moments I remember of my mother.
My memories are not peaceful. I recall the sound of gunshots breaks out erratically from the cover of night. I cower pitifully behind my family's hut, crying and shuddering. I hide my face in my hands, and see my tears fall on the sand. The unsteady flicker of fire lights the ground beyond my hiding place as the village begins to catch fire. Screams cut the air as I hear more gunshots.
"Kei!" my mother screams, running. Her feet kick up sand and she calls desperately, brokenly, "Kei! My son! Kei!"
Over the loud noise of the fighting, I hear men yelling. I don't have to look to know they carry powerful guns carelessly, herding the villagers like animals as we cry out and cower. They demand our men join them in their fight for freedom.
"Kei! Kei! Run!" my mother screams. I watch through my hands as she leaves me behind the hut, running to find my brother. I close my eyes against the living nightmare, but still hear what happens next.
"Get out of the way," a man commands roughly. Anger taints his voice like poison.
"Kei, you must run from here. Run away!" she shouts over the chaos. My body begins to shake and I feel cold.
"Stop! Do not touch her!" I hear my brother yell loudly. I can see him, just a young boy yelling at the man, defiant though he wields nothing but a hard glare against a semi-automatic gun. The image twists a knot of fear in my stomach. I feel bile in my throat even before I hear the next gunshot. I throw up as my mother emits an ugly, bitter scream.
"This freedom you fight for," I hear distantly, "this war has broken you. You are no longer a man, but a beast."
Another gun shot rings out, perhaps the last of that night. I collapse next to my own vomit, weak and disbelieving.
The loud chaos merges with the sound of a great storm above the village. First, the rain begins falling in hard, cold droplets. Then the clouds begin to clash with thunder and lightning. The rain squelches the fire and raindrops replace my tears.
Instead of washing me away, the storm strands me where I lay. I don't dare open my eyes for fear that if I look at the rain washing across the desert, the water would be tinged red with the blood of my village and family. My body becomes numb and I eventually fall asleep.
When I return to myself, the old lady has stopped paying me any attention. Her goat bleats again rather pitifully, looking at me hopefully. I look back without emotion. Though I sit in the shade, I can feel the heat of the sun as it burns the land dry. In the distance I see clouds on the horizon, always lingering there after the first stormy night.
My body feels thin and dehydrated. I've sat facing the clouds for over a day, simply watching the horizon. The old woman begins to sing as my eyes drift closed, too heavy to hold up any longer. The clouds will come, and the rain will drop again, but I am sure it will be too late. As the old woman said, everything here dies. I feel my body begin to disintegrate. Soon it will be just another bone strewn across the dancing desert sands.
Our Review
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